[Iman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge – Day #22] Butchering My Own Blog Post – Part 3

I’m having too much fun with this series. (Related: part 1 and part 2)

This time, however, instead of a story, nine-year-old Iman had written about a true incident.

The Bird’s Nest

We had to repair the exhaust fan in our bathroom. It was stuck.My father called the maintenance to repair it.When they took the exhaust fan, they saw a small bird’s nest.They brushed it away. The maintenance told that there were a lot of twigs and brantches from the nest, inside the exhaust,stuck. So, they told that they would bring an exhaust fan after a couple of days. My father checked if there were any more nests and there were a lot of them!!! Everyday my father brushed it off. But, the little bird, who lived in these nests, never gave up building. Then my father felt sympathy towards the little bird. When the maintenance came, my father told them that he needed no fan in the bathroom and so they went. My father stuck a piece of cardboard on the hole of the fan. And so,the little bird made its nest again and lives happily now

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• I’m pretty sure that I hadn’t read over this piece after I had finished writing. The lack of space after some of the commas irks me.

• I like how I call the repairmen ‘the maintenance’. Makes them sound like some sort of futuristic robot-fighting force.

• How many times do I have to write ‘my father’ and ‘exhaust’?

• I’ve been staring at ‘brantches’ for some time now. You do not belong in there, ‘t’!

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Okay. I actually I thought there’d be more things to poke fun at, but it seems like I’ve run out. Do you spot anything funny/stupid? Let me know in the comments below!